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A/S/L?

19 Jun

My Life In A Nutshell

I believe myself to be infatuated with everything social media, so I am surprised it has taken me this long to start a blog. I don’t intend on it being anything fancy like Perez Hilton or Cupcakes and Cashmere. But it definitely will be a way for me to connect myself to one more portal of social media.

I can say that social media and the move over to digital has been something I have been “obsessed” with since the beginning. Back in the days when AOL was new and chat rooms were still safe, I was that 12 year old girl who would spend her casual leisure time chatting with strangers whom she’d never meet.

I can’t say that spending my time in doors chatting with strangers didn’t get me in trouble. You’d think, what’s the worst that can happen? A couple of lies never hurt anyone. I wasn’t going out drinking and partying like some… there’s no way…. Well, let’s just say it did the exact opposite.

It all began when  my parents realized I was spending too much time in these chatrooms. Concerned with my apparent obsession with this fake online portal–they tried to disable my internet use and put “strict” parental controls on my AOL capabilities. I didn’t take this lightly–to say the least. In fact, it bothered me that my ever so loving parents had put a limit to the only thing that mattered to me in the world (yes I was a dramatic teenager). I had to take action–and action I took. One day during my 30 minutes of bending the truth about everything in my life (ie. my age, my name, where I was from, what I looked like), I had this GENIUS idea how to mysteriously connect to the internet. I was going to download a FREE MODEM! I couldn’t believe I hadn’t come up with this earlier. I needed to fuel my addiction and I finally found the cure. I downloaded the first free service that popped up inputted my information (country: I clicked the first United I saw) and I was ready to start living up my booming (yet fake) social life. I had what I needed, a connection to the internet–now all I had to do was not get caught.

A month after my devious act, I thought I was in the clear. My parents still hadn’t figured out that I was spending hours on end on the internet there was obviously nothing to worry about. Or so I thought…….There are certain moments in your life that you will never be able to forget. It doesn’t matter if you were young and your brain wasn’t fully developed–the moment was so terrifying that it is engraved in your brain, and will be until the day you die. Never to be forgotten. The day my parents found out about my sneaky internet transaction was one of those days. I was downstairs on the computer (obviously) minding my own business, when all of a sudden I heard someone scream “WHAT THE FUCK” from upstairs. The angry voice was one I knew well (considering it was usually me who created the anger), my fathers. I wasn’t sure where this anger was coming from, but I had a sneaking suspicion that it had something to do with me. I was always involved in any heated interaction. His footsteps sounded like thunder booming from upstairs and he was heading my direction. He stomped down the stairs and stopped when he reached the bottom. There I was, dear eyed and “innocent”. He shoved an AT&T bill to my face that read “$5,700” and once again screamed “What the fuck is this?” At first i really didn’t know. “I don’t know.” I responded–my voice shaky. Fear was emanating from my tone. He shoved it in my face again, there were calls being made out, nightly, to the United Kingdom. I instantly knew I had fucked up. In an instant that night where I ever so sneakily downloaded that free service flashed back in my eyes. I clicked the first country I saw that said “United” it must have been the United Kingdom. Everything after the realization of my fuck up was a blur. All I knew was I couldn’t look, talk, or even be in close vicinity to my father for some time after that. I was too terrified of what he might say to me. Thankfully my parents knew someone who was high up at AT&T and was able to get the bill down to $400 something. I was calling long distance every night to Europe, they were able to get the charges to local long distance.I got lucky that time. And my parents learned a serious lesson. They realized that by disabling my need to be on the internet it ended up costing them. To this very day they make sure that if any of their friends are thinking about limiting their child’s use of the internet to think twice.

So I guess in the end, I have helped the children of America (or at least in my parents social circle) in enabling them to live the internet obsessed life they have always dreamt of. So in a way, I guess I should just say “Your Welcome.”

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